"Tammy Needs..."

Saw this on Whit's blog and thought it was too funny. I am giving up my magic 8-ball & my horroscope scrolls! So I went to the ALL KNOWING, ALL POWERFUL (sounds like a swift that I have met before) Google Gods and entered "Tammy needs", and this is what Google told me:

• Tammy Needs information by January 1st (sooner would actually be better.) (no joke, this is from doesthislookinfected.com)
  
• Tammy Needs to settle something in herself (ummm... duh!)
  
• Tammy Needs to know a performance installation that incorporates autobiographical text, original music and audience interaction and asks the following questions:
  -What is the difference between country music and performance art?
  -What does a fifty five year old, trailer trash, ex-heterosexual, ex-famous country and western singer need to learn in order to become a contemporary lesbian performance artist?
  ( I don't have the energy to make something this elaborate up, but I must admit that my curiosity is now peaked.)
  
• Tammy Needs your prayers and good wishes (this came from The Wicca, Witchcraft, and Paganism Community. & please don't pray for me, just think positive thoughts.)
  
• Tammy Needs a caregiver (who doesn't!?)
  
• Tammy Needs more opportunities to be creative. (now this is getting a wee bit bit spooky.)
  
• Tammy Needs all information by January 5th, 2003 in order to post it on the website. (that was ALL information people! I am obviously late, so hurry up!)
  
• Tammy Needs to find a better boyfriend. (This one is WAYYY off base. No question about it, I HAVE the BEST boyfriend in the entire world!!!)
  
• Tammy needs constant care. (and that is exactly the reason why my boyfriend is the best! ) : ')
  
• Tammy needs a great deal of support, and workers need to be attentive to Tammy's need to process her grief slowly. (Can someone tell me what I am grieving over?)
  
• Tammy needs a fan blowing on her constantly because she has difficulty breathing. (no comment)
  
• Princess Tammy needs a MAJOR reality check (whatever!!!)